Important Infomation from an Expert

Do NOT buy Keebler Pecan Sandies Reduced Fat Cookies!

They say:
"25% less fat that original Sandies...."

I say:
50% less taste!

They say:
"melt-in-your-mouth Cookies with Crunchy Pecans...."

I say:
No they don't. It takes a giant swig of chocolate milk to make them melt in your mouth.

....and the pecans are teeny.


Trust me on this.

I've done the field work.

R.I.P.

Like lambs to slaughter.....

Ah.....Pier One....You were my favorite...
we had some good times together, didn't we?

The first cut is the deepest.....

This took a while...

I didn't actually burn them...
this was more for symbolism.

Nice touch, no?

So close it's scary.....

You Are Strawberry Cake

Fresh, sassy, and romantic. You're a total flirt, who never would turn down a sugary treat. Occasionally you're a bit moody - but you usually stay sweet!

What Kind of Cake Are You?

Yea!

Normally I wouldn't show y'all these pictures
because the den still needs to be painted and we need a new media cabinet...
~but~
The sale of the house meant that we could get a new, bigger flat screen for the den!
WOOT!!

The photo doesn't do it justice.
It'll look so much better on the new media cabinet.
Where I used to have to sit (so I could see) to watch important shows...
like...HEROES, LOST, Dancing with the Stars

Partial view of den...just to give you some perspective.
(wall where desk is still awaits accent color paint)

My favorite spot to sit ...
see how the couch sags more on the left side?
Yeah.
That's where my fat ass sits all the time....
hence...the sagging.
I'm also LOVING my new upholstered ottoman
(with nail head trim)
that I got for only $108.00 at Ballard's Backroom
when I was in Atlanta at Easter.
(original retail price: $398.00)

The 32 inch flat screen sitting forlornly on the dining room table...

....awaiting its fate.

Where will it end up?

The master bedroom?

The kitchen wall?

Who knows?


One thing I do know:

with this new t.v. I'll be able to see the
pores in Juliet's skin next week
on LOST!

Una cerveza, por favor

Over at Eve's she has a post up today about salsa and margaritas.

It reminded me of something I overheard yesterday....

I was in Hell's only kitchen specialty shop.

While I was on one side of the check-out counter, another customer across the way was talking about how she was buying a margarita machine because she'd "just had a pool put in for the kids....so I deserve something too...."

The clerk told her it was $199.00.

The owner of the shop (who'd been waiting on me) turned around and said, "Oh, no. The Margarita machines are $299.00 not $199.00."

Ladron!!!

I'm pretty sure you could buy an actual Mexican to fix your margaritas for you for $299.00!!

...and before anybody gets pissed off: it's okay for me to say that because I'm Mexican.

Oh....and in an interesting side note: I grew up in San Antonio, Texas in the 60's. Back then....Wednesday was "Mexican food day" in the school cafeterias of the district where I went to school.

Today is Wednesday....coincidence?

Hmmmmm.....


Hasta la vista, baby!



p.s. Fridays were "Fish Day" in the school cafeteria. So my school district was "politically correct" before anybody ever heard the term. They not only kept all the Mexicans happy, they pleased the Catholics too!

p.s.s. I was raised Catholic. Don't start with me.

...and yet more evidence

Not only is premature wrinkling on the décolleté caused by the sun, it is also caused by the way you sleep. To get rid of the wrinkles along your bust line, get in the habit of sleeping on your back instead of on your side. Sleeping is the second cause of wrinkles, after the sun, and when you sleep on your side you are ironing in wrinkles into your skin. On average, you are spending over 2,500 hours per year reversing the positive effects of your skincare treatments just in your sleep. Plastic Surgeons, Dermatologists, Estheticians, and Movie Stars have been using this technique for years.
source

A Public Service Announcement from Pissy

I've mentioned before that I spend lots and lots of time in the sun.

Always have.

Some summers I would get so dark, all you could see were the whites of my eyes and my teeth.

Seriously.

If I had a scanner, I'd show ya'll some pictures.

Anyway.... a few years ago, I started noticing that my decolletage....was looking particularly.... wrinkly.

For instance....it looked like I had sleep wrinkles on my chest.

You know what I mean....when you've laid in one position for so long that the sheets have left their imprint on your body? Usually your face?

For me...it was my chest.

Only those "sleep wrinkles" never went away!

Those bastards hung around all day!

My damn chest looked like a topographic map of Ecuador.

Ecuador

My wrinkly chest

All this time I assumed that the wrinkles were from the thousands of hours I'd spent in the sun.

Imagine my surprise when I read in Real Simple magazine that those wrinkles were caused by sleeping on my side!!!!

I KNOW!

It shocked me too!

Apparently the shifting of your weight to one side while sleeping will cause wrinkles on your chest over time.

WTF?!?!?

Why didn't anyone tell me!!!

I'd have learned to love sleeping flat on my back if someone had warned me about this.

So all you gals out there who are still young enough to prevent this from happening....let this be a lesson to you.


(I apologize if the picture of my wrinkly chest made anyone gag, but I felt it necessary to prove my point.)