Oh my God, y'all.......
Baby-mama-drama has got my ass worn OUT!
I've tested 42 men, women and children since yesterday morning.
That's in two counties.....
Oh, and the one inmate.
So make that 43 total.
I ended up having to go to the courthouse in another town to do the collection on the inmate. He'd already been taken there for a hearing and had waived extradition to another state.... which meant when his hearing was over, he'd be leaving our area.
Since they'd been trying to get this guy tested forever ~off I went.
I gotta say, it was a little weird getting a sample from somebody wearing handcuffs and ankle shackles in the hallway of a courthouse with a deputy standing right next to me.....
Ever tried to get somebody's thumbprint when they're wearing handcuffs?
and....
Honestly?
I think he's probably the kid's father. He has the child's name spelled out in tatoos on his fingers..... who else would do that?
For his sake, I hope he is the father.
otherwise....
Man... is he gonna be pissed about that tatoo.
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As if just living in Alabama wasn't bad enough...
ReplyDeleteSince I've been paying attention to what you've been up to, I've decided to delay retirement indefinitely.
billy: Since I HAVE to remain living in hell until Sweet Man retires in 17 months and 2 weeks (but who's counting?).... and this "job" only requires that I work two days a MONTH~I figured: what the hell.
ReplyDeleteand the $ is really amazing.
At least there's cash and blog fodder, otherwise it would just be a re-run of Springer. Good stuff!
ReplyDeleteyou don't have to pap smear the inmates mouth do you Pissy? Just stick em' for blood right?
ReplyDeleteWhen Sweet Man retires, where are you headed then?
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine not knowing who the father of my kids is...
ReplyDeleteWhat a life some lead.
hehe
shannon: You've got that right! But I'm used to it from my last job. ;-)
ReplyDeletethanks for stopping by!
jerry: I use a looooonnnnn q-tip. No blood draws. I don't think I'd do it if I had to get blood. :(
Mr. Fab: We're not sure...Sweet Man wants to retire to Auburn, but I think I want to go to Georgia since that's where my daughters are and Sweet Man's son...
We used to think: the beach
But all these hurricanes kinda stopped that :(
Any suggestions?
Sherry: I know, right?
I've been fingerprinted while in handcuffs but I"ve never been the one doing the fingerprinting, so I can't commiserate with you, sorry...
ReplyDeleteOMG, this sounds like a tv show Pissy.
ReplyDeleteDamn, I see a good reality show in the works!!!
Honostly, I'm really jealous of your job. Occasionally, OK twice, we had patients who weren't sure who the father was (out of a possible 3 different guys-sheesh)but all we did was send the blood away to a lab and then we didn't even get the results, the patient did.
ReplyDeleteMy job is soooooo boring compared to yours. I need a new job....
ReplyDeleteYour new job sounds very interesting. I'm not sure if I'd want to do it, but it's interesting nonetheless.
ReplyDeletePissy, please please please tell me you are writing a blog entry about last night's episode of LOST. No one here at the office watches it, and I need to "talk" to someone about everything that happened.
I'm picturing you in your little pink scrubs with your long Q-Tip trying to gracefully swab *ahem* some guy in shackles inner cheek.
ReplyDeleteI think we are all going to love your new job, Pissy!
Was the name spelled out in Chinese characters? Because it's probably wrong and really says "I knocked up some trailer trash chick and all I got was this lousy cotton swab" in Mandarin.
ReplyDeleteNice! Do you have to disinfect yourself when you get home? I mean it sounds like you are dealing with "bottom dwellers".
ReplyDeleteWhere the hell are you working now?? hahaha....yeah lets hope he is the father cause his anger management skills are probably not up to date!! anyway... off that subject i'll be in ATL in 14 days!!!! yayyyyyyyyy!!!! im gonna get to see little piss and lindz, megs and shena may be coming up too!! misss ya
ReplyDeleteEm
Pissy, F - Georgia. You know where you are moving when Sweet Man retires: Hot Lips Village. I'm not even sure why you have to wait until he retires, really.
ReplyDeletetoast: heh! It actually surprised me at how excited people were to be fingered printed!
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking: "Dude! this could determine your financial future for the next 19 years!"
nowheregirl: It does, doesn't it? ;-)
Nonny: It IS kinda fun, actually. I was the person who received the results when I worked at the DA's office. I'd always go out and announce when we had "a winner" in the genetic lottery! :)
e: I did too. That's why I quit the other one. And then this one just found me!
kc: It is interesting. And since I'm used to dealing with people in this situation, it doesn't bother me. But I can see how it would bother some people....
I should do a post about last night's LOST...so much to think about...as usual!
signgurl: Heh! that was pretty much the picture. Add hot pink Crocs and you got it!
Also factor in my pink peony patterened "Vera Bradley" Mary-Poppins-looking duffle bag and my hot pink with lime green straps messenger bag.... ;-)
limpy: Don't ya know that's what alot of those so-called "chinese" symbols say?!?!? heh!
but nah...this was actually one letter of the child's name on each of his fingers....
I know...poetic...
pud: heh! Nah..I just change gloves before each one. I go through ALOT of gloves...
Em!!!!!! Where ya been, girl! Read a couple of posts down...I explain my new "joblet". I'm a DNA collector for a lab.
Little P is excited that you're coming to ATL...she can't wait to see you!
Hot lips: have you got a cabana all set aside for me at Hot Lips Village?
Cuz if ya do, I should have all my obligations wrapped up here by mid-May...
I meant FINGER printed!
ReplyDelete